Orejana Bull for Cowboys Only
by Gail Gardner
I hears of a blowout up in town,
So I 'lows I'll take her in;
When it comes to slingin' a dancin' foot,
I'm thar like a quart o' gin.
I digs way down for my spike-tail clothes,
Then I curry-combs my hair;
I buys myself some yaller boots,
Which a gent should always wear.
When I prances up to a likely gal,
And gits me a good tight hold,
And skates her out on the ball-room floor,
I knocks them town sports cold.
Now I was a-havin' a right good time,
Just a-hittin' a long keen trot,
When a danged old gal horns into me,
And nails me on the spot.
I didn't like the looks of her eye,
An' when she turns on me her talk,
I seen that she meant business
So I settles back to a walk.
Sez she, "Why, Mr. Cowboy Man,
"How lonely it must be,
"To live way out on that there ranch,
"And not have no company."
An' then she puts on what she thinks
Is a wise and knowin' grin.
"I'll bet you cook your own vittles too,
'That's why you're a-gettin' thin."
Sez she, "Man is so helpless like,
"They need a lot of care."
And the meanin' way she said it,
Why, it like to riz my hair.
Consarn her bloomin' picture,
There was nothin' else to do,
Fer I seen I couldn't dodge her,
So I grabbed my hat and blew.
Don't want no woman around my ranch.
Closer'n a half a mile,
Objectin' to chawin' tobacker,
And everything else worth while.
I've learnt to do without 'em fine,
I'm snug as a bump on a log.
An' a woman just nacherally wouldn't go
With me 'nd my horse 'nd my dawg.
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